Wednesday, August 15, 2012

63 Shades of Maxine



                                                        

So I hear people talking about this series of books called “50 Shades of Gray” and immediately I figure they are talking about the latest hair color choices produced by Clairol or L’Oreal.  And like, I’m excited because there NEEDS to be at least 50 Shades of Gray for folks in their 60’s and older.  But like so many of the political ads these days, it is all a big lie.  However, I am still intrigued.  So, I ask a friend to lend me her latest selection of fine reading material which shall henceforth be called “ooh la la” and I begin my journey into the dark place.

Now for those of you who have not ventured into the “ooh la la” dark place, I shall summarize.  This is a story about “subs” and “doms”.  And if you are like me (and who wouldn’t want to be except for the granny panties), your favorite  “subs” include tuna, deli and that old favorite, meatball.  And of course my favorite Dom was of the DeLouise brand.  But nothing prepared me for the “sub” and “dom” activities in this trilogy.  Hey, I’m all for a playroom, but I like to use a cue when knocking balls around on a pool table.  And don’t get me started on the proper use of clothes pins. 

As I read and said to myself how silly this “ooh la la” stuff was,  I thought for sure my hot flashes were making a comeback as the sweat was dripping from my face and my panting had to be from allergies.   Dom DeLouise never got that kind of a reaction from me for sure!

And there is no question that these two young people were ingesting some kind of energy drink because no one can be that “active” that many times in one day.  I know.  I tried….years ago of course before the granny panties faze of my life.  Now I’m just 63 shades of Maxine and with the help of my sponsors, Clairol and L’Oreal, it ain’t Gray!

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