The First Step in a Journey...

I recently saw this quote which really touched me.  “The first step in a journey is to lose your way”.  Actually, it didn’t just touch me.  It sort of mauled me and then stood back and smirked.  The quote sounds so lovely and makes you desire to begin that journey, but if you are me (and who wouldn’t want to be?) you would know this is not a journey to be taken lightly. 

 

So let’s begin.  First, the quote explains, you have to lose your way.  So instead of a journey that takes me from Davenport to Paris, or from Tel Aviv to Johannesburg, my journey begins by getting lost trying to get from my bedroom to the living room.  I have to pass a bathroom and as soon as that happens, not only do I lose my way, but I lose control of my bladder.  So I have to stop and use the facilities and by that time I have no idea where I was going, but it sure as Hell didn’t end up in Paris.

 

Then there is the journey from the mall parking lot to the entrance to the mall.  Instead of roaming the gloaming in Scotland (a journey that sounds pretty nice), I end up spending a weekend trying to find my car.  Even with the help of the car fob that triggers lights and noise, there is no help for me on this journey and no frequent walking miles until I find my destination.  I always seem to remember where I parked the weekend before, but not 60 minutes ago.  Now I don’t leave home without a stick and a white flag to wave indicating I am giving up.

And then there is losing your train of thought.  Another fabulous journey that occurs, oh, I don’t know; every couple of minutes?  And the scenery along this journey is really unpleasant.  Talk about the “first step”….I can’t take a step without a post it note and pen in my hand, just in case I have a thought.  Because given any distraction along the way from the first step to the next step and I am a gonner.  A conversation with me includes innumerable “now what was I saying” interludes.  And even when the other person remembers what I was saying, I have already lost the purpose of the comment in the first place.

So don’t talk to me about what a great thing it is to take a journey by losing your way.  I believe in taking a journey the old fashioned way, with a guide and a limo.  Now I just have to figure out how to get the limo into my apartment and find a guide who has stock in post it notes.  Oh, and I wanted to mention…………damn…….I lost my train of thought.  And the journey continues.